Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Yes I'm still here. ::strangle::

*Warning...this post is complainey. Just figured I'd let people know first in case they didn't want to read a lot of pregnant bitching this morning.*

The hugeness. The swelling. The heartburn. The return of first trimester nausea. All of these things are my life right now and all of them are horrible beyond words. The sight of my ankles is enough to make me cry. (Well really only my right ankle...my left doesn't really swell at all. Weird.)

But there is one thing that is worse.

I'm 6 days from my due date and I'm still working. I don't think I'm kind of superhero for doing so...plenty of women work right up until they go into labor and I always figured that I would be one of them. It's been especially miserable for the past week or two though as Baby B has dropped really low into my pelvis making it virtually impossible to even make a trip to the fax machine without practically peeing my pants. And I've found that the only thing more miserable than feeling like I can't walk or being exhausted or in pain is having these things pointed out to me by other people.

Oh the comments.

I think I'm tired now? Well I better sleep while I still can because my baby will keep me up at night. Thanks for the suggestion, Captain Obvious, but last I checked, I'm not some kind of crazy sleep camel that can store extra sleep in my hump (bump?) for later use. Actually, I'm pretty sure that I will actually get MORE sleep when my child is here considering that I currently get up to use the bathroom at least 7 times a night which works out to being up and about at least once an hour. At least when I'm on maternity leave, I can take a nap during the day. Comfortably. While able to lie on my stomach and not feel like my legs are being ripped out of their sockets wishbone style. (Make a wish!! I'd like to go into labor RIGHT. NOW. PLEASE.)

And of course my personal favorite that I have been hearing every day when I walk into the office from no less than 3 people..."You're still here?" Nope. You're not really seeing me right now. I'm just a huge, bloated figment of your imagination. Maybe you should stop smoking so much crack before you come to work.

I am to the point where I can not only not take pregnancy anymore, but I can't take other people anymore. In fact, I could probably tolerate the pregnancy part better if other people would shut the eff up. It also seems like the worst offenders are women that already have children and I'm thinking...shouldn't they know better? At this point I have a mental list a mile long of things that I am going to be absolutely sure to NEVER EVER EVER say to a pregnant woman again.

So yesterday I made the executive decision that this coming Friday is going to be my last day of work before I go on maternity leave. Yes, I was going to work until my water broke, but I'm to the point where I'm so uncomfortable and so anxious that being here is bad for my well being as well as the well being of anyone who gets within a 10 foot radius of me. I started to realize that if I don't give people an end date, they will continue to unthinkingly pile ridiculous projects on my desk that I will kill myself trying to get finished in a day because this baby could come any second.

But let's not kid ourselves. Because it's just my luck that she will go a week overdue at which point I'll have to be induced. Oh yeah...I also used to say that I was against being induced if I went over and would rather the baby come when she's ready, but that all flew out the window around week 36.

Basically, I love my job and I love my coworkers, but I would also love to continue to love them later on. And in order for that to happen, I have to get the hell out of here.

Friday cannot get here fast enough.


14 comments:

  1. I stopped working around six months because it was too much. I commend you for doing it this long but also, people suck and I was so glad to be out of the company of the world if I chose to be. I definitely slept more when Nate came because I could sleep when he slept and comfortably and Chris and I traded getting up in the night so there was even more sleep. Somedays I wish we could go back to newborn haha.

    Come on Betty!

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  2. Oh Mama Salt, big hugs!! I think it sounds smart to go ahead and stop working this coming Friday.

    I'm only 18 weeks and I've already been getting the "oh you're tired now/tailbone hurts now/pelvis hurts now (insert complaint here), this is only the beginning" in basically EVERY conversation I have with my MIL. So I feel you on that one. It's already old and I've got a LONG way to go.

    You can do it! Hopefully just one more week to hang in there, or maybe even less!!

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  3. Man, these are the things I am so not looking forward to about being pregnant. I'm glad you'll be able to stop working and put an end to at least some of the frustrations you're going through!

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  4. I remember 2 months ago exactly feeling JUST like you do! I was pissed about the return of the nausea...WTF! I actually worked from home that last week b/c I physically couldn't bear the hour long commute and sitting at my desk moaning in pain.

    I also don't get the whole "sleep now while you can" b/c like you said you can't store sleep and anyone who has been 9 months pregnant knows you can't sleep for shit anyway.

    I also thought like you I would get more rest after the baby came. Umm not so much. Yes you are up every hour now to pee but then you can go right back to bed. With the baby in the beginning they are often up every 2 hours or so and it can take an hour to get them back to sleep. Not trying to scare you, just keeping it real yo!

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  5. Oh I'm so sorry for you, I remember how it was, and then again I have no clue since we have the best maternity leave in Denmark, you get to stop working 4 weeks before your duedate. I bet you will give birth on Saturday, which will be exactly a year after me:)

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  6. if you need me to give anyone a virtual (or literal) punch in THEIR babymaker...you let me know.

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  7. I hope she comes soon, like today. I'm sorry this last bit has been such a struggle. Shame on those people making you feel angry. From what I hear though the advice NEVER stops coming you may need to wear ear buds for 18 years and counting. *fingers crossed the labor will start any second*

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  8. aw I personally feel so bad for women that work til labor. I hope you get a chance to enjoy your time off before the baby comes. I HATE the unsolicited advice. Bleck. I am barely pregnant and I get it ALL THE FRIGGIN time!! It'll be crazy when I'm showing...I welcome any advice on what to say to these annoying people.
    Here's hoping B comes soon and you get more comfortable!!

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  9. So, according to your tagline you were due yesterday :) I hope Betty has happily made her appearance and you are snuggling together RIGHT THIS MOMENT :)

    But if not, I hope she is at least letting you walk without peeing a little ;)

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  10. Oh my gosh! You're pregnant! And due NOW! If you haven't already had the baby, I was induced and it wasn't a big deal! I have been gone way too long from blogland! Congrats to you and can't wait for the post about the delivery. Turns out that you WILL sleep more after baby arrives. Just be sure to sleep whenever the baby sleeps. Don't try to do stuff around the house while the baby is sleeping...you can put her in a carryall or in a little bassinet or whatever and keep her next to you while you work. Can't wait to see pics. So exciting!

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  11. Aww hun, well, by now your little peanut should be here already and I can't wait to see pictures! I'm so sorry for your coworker's comments--it would annoy me more than anything to know that these women already have children and therefore no excuses to say idiotic things.

    Hmph.

    Anyway, hope you are enjoying time with the little one! XOXOXO

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  12. I assume that little lady bean has made her appearance? Congrats mama!

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  13. Stopping in to say hello and wonder how things are on your end. I'm sure you're busy with baby and hope all is well! XOXO

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  14. Hope all is well with you, love, and would love an update of life with the little one whenever you can (OBVIOUSLY you are busy at the moment). Bet you are having the time of your life! XOXO

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